Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Needle, Freeze, Chest Tube

****I've been going back in time so as not to miss anything that's happened during my recovery. I was discharged from hospital on the 7th and have been snuggled up with the G-man ever since. So sit back, take a deep breath, really feel that breath, then keep reading...I'll catch up to real time soon.****

January 4th - 126 lbs 

This is it. June had just arrived when a porter slammed through the door ready to take me down for my spanking new chest tube. I plastered a smile on my face, pretending to be brave, and said "let's do this". I even wore my slippers so I'd look good for the medical team...cause they'd go easier on me if I looked hawt, right?

The staff was awesome. I immediately felt at ease, as they were receptive to my humour and even gave it back. I bonded with the nurse (Deb you are so cool, you held my hand and I didn't even have to ask) and even had Terry technician guy (sorry don't know your actual title) scratching my eyebrow as I wasn't able to move once inside the "donut" aka CT machine. 

After Terry reviewed the procedure and the risks, I advised them that my favorite colour was red...you know, I figured that was important. Might as well get to know each other a bit.

What a difference between my expectations and reality. 

The surgeon had me terrified of the pain that was to be inflicted on my already tortured body. The worst part was the freezing; needle was jammed into my upper right chest, freezing went in, a couple seconds of burning, then nothing. Needle came out and I said, in total disbelief, "that's it?" Next a big arrow thingy was stuck in my chest and I went back in the donut. I came back out, was marked and the tube was threaded into my body. There was pressure. It wasn't completely comfortable, but it wasn't awful.

The best part is that I felt like Kelly was with me throughout the entire thing. 

I got back to the room after taking the VIP elevator with my porter buddy - although I was disappointed that the red carpet seemed to be missing. 

I felt like a freaking superhero! I did it! I got through the scary chest tube insertion and I wasn't even sore!!!


Oooooops.

Spoke too soon.

Thank you medical world for the invention of pain meds. Once the freezing wore off I felt like I'd been hit by a bus. Or...had a chest tube inserted.

My right side felt paralyzed. So heavy; could barely move my arm or turn to the right. I would have been an interesting one to watch on Dancing With The Stars or WipeOut.

June spent the rest of the day with me; it was so great to catch up. I don't know if there was a moment of silence, as once the pain meds kicked in I was golden. Well maybe silver. 

Regardless, I kicked butt in Sequence (board game). 

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